Whacked Man writes fake news.
Whacked Man's Articles
November 25, 2006 by Whacked Man
SPAIN (Whacked Planet) - Imam Mohamed Kamal Mustafa, author of the controversial book Women In Islam, was released today after serving a fifteen month sentence in a Spanish prison. Mustafa had thought he was on his way to fame and fortune and possibly the Oprah Winfrey show after publishing his book but saw his hopes dashed when a Spanish court sentenced him to prison for provoking violence. The book had instructed Muslim men on the proper methods of beating their wives without leaving bruises....
November 25, 2006 by Whacked Man
SPAIN (Whacked Planet) - Imam Mohamed Kamal Mustafa, author of the controversial book Women In Islam, was released today after serving a fifteen month sentence in a Spanish prison. Mustafa had thought he was on his way to fame and fortune and possibly the Oprah Winfrey show after publishing his book but saw his hopes dashed when a Spanish court sentenced him to prison for provoking violence. The book had instructed Muslim men on the proper methods of beating their wives without leaving bruises....
November 11, 2006 by Whacked Man
ROCHESTER, Minn. – In an effort to fight childhood obesity some elementary schools in Minnesota have removed desks from classrooms and are now eliminating books as well. The idea behind the experiment is that by shedding desks students would be able to shed a few pounds as well. As for why the schools are also eliminating books, Dr. James Levine a researcher at the Mayo Clinic stated, “I have no idea.”

Deskless students are required to stand and move around and may sit down on the floor ...
November 11, 2006 by Whacked Man
ROCHESTER, Minn. – In an effort to fight childhood obesity some elementary schools in Minnesota have removed desks from classrooms and are now eliminating books as well. The idea behind the experiment is that by shedding desks students would be able to shed a few pounds as well. As for why the schools are also eliminating books, Dr. James Levine a researcher at the Mayo Clinic stated, “I have no idea.”

Deskless students are required to stand and move around and may sit down on the floor ...
October 25, 2006 by Whacked Man
Wayne Holsom, the man who unsuccessfully tried hiring an undercover police officer to murder his wife's cat heads to court Wednesday. Prosecutors aren't saying exactly what they plan to charge Holsom with as no actual harm occurred to the cat in question. Holsum's wife for her part is demanding the death penalty for her soon to be ex-husband.

With their constant quarreling and shouting the Holsum's were the second most hated family on their street second only to "the weird Mormons with the ba...
October 25, 2006 by Whacked Man
Wayne Holsom, the man who unsuccessfully tried hiring an undercover police officer to murder his wife's cat heads to court Wednesday. Prosecutors aren't saying exactly what they plan to charge Holsom with as no actual harm occurred to the cat in question. Holsum's wife for her part is demanding the death penalty for her soon to be ex-husband.

With their constant quarreling and shouting the Holsum's were the second most hated family on their street second only to "the weird Mormons with the ba...
October 22, 2006 by Whacked Man
DALLAS (Whacked Planet) – No one in Dallas expected two graduating seniors to be arrested for serving marijuana laced brownies to the Lake Highlands High School teacher staff. So it comes as quite a shock to report that one of the teachers poisoned by the THC containing brownies, has recently been arrested for possession of cannabis.

Seymour Smith, a Physical Education teacher at Lake Highlands High School was arrested Wednesday in the High School’s parking lot while eating what local Police...
October 22, 2006 by Whacked Man
DALLAS (Whacked Planet) – No one in Dallas expected two graduating seniors to be arrested for serving marijuana laced brownies to the Lake Highlands High School teacher staff. So it comes as quite a shock to report that one of the teachers poisoned by the THC containing brownies, has recently been arrested for possession of cannabis.

Seymour Smith, a Physical Education teacher at Lake Highlands High School was arrested Wednesday in the High School’s parking lot while eating what local Police...
October 10, 2006 by Whacked Man
NABLUS, West Bank - Israeli troops killed the world renown Bobo the clown in an air strike Sunday against a Palestinian home where he was entertaining a group of Arab children. The attack has left experts on Middle Eastern affairs completely baffled. The question they and everyone else has been asking is why Bobo the clown, and why now?

Maj. Gen. Udi Adam head of Israelfs Northern command who may or may not have had anything to do with the air strike commented, gThe real question the media ...
October 10, 2006 by Whacked Man
NABLUS, West Bank - Israeli troops killed the world renown Bobo the clown in an air strike Sunday against a Palestinian home where he was entertaining a group of Arab children. The attack has left experts on Middle Eastern affairs completely baffled. The question they and everyone else has been asking is why Bobo the clown, and why now?

Maj. Gen. Udi Adam head of Israelfs Northern command who may or may not have had anything to do with the air strike commented, gThe real question the media ...
October 7, 2006 by Whacked Man
Iran's supreme leader Sayyid Ali Khameini participated in a question and answer session on his website ww.leader.ir/langs/EN/index.php. His hope was to educate and give advice to Iranians on the Muslim holy month of Ramadan. Below is a brief transcript of those messages.

K: Thank you everyone for joining me in this wonderful new medium with which we can discuss matters of importance relating to the holy month of Ramadan. Please ask your questions freely.

A: How many times is it ok to mastu...
October 7, 2006 by Whacked Man
Iran's supreme leader Sayyid Ali Khameini participated in a question and answer session on his website ww.leader.ir/langs/EN/index.php. His hope was to educate and give advice to Iranians on the Muslim holy month of Ramadan. Below is a brief transcript of those messages.

K: Thank you everyone for joining me in this wonderful new medium with which we can discuss matters of importance relating to the holy month of Ramadan. Please ask your questions freely.

A: How many times is it ok to mastu...
September 22, 2006 by Whacked Man
LOS ANGELES (Whacked Planet) – While restaurants and grocery stores across America are pulling spinach from the shelves in lieu of an E. Coli contamination, friends and family members of the beloved Popeye the Sailorman are asking for the public’s assistance in locating him.

According to friends, Popeye went missing around 4 am Pacific Standard Time after a long night of brawling and consuming large quantities of canned spinach. Given the recent cases of E. Coli infection that have sickened a...
September 16, 2006 by Whacked Man
ISLAMABAD Turkey (WP) – Barely a moment had passed before angry Muslims across the Middle East took to the streets after the Pope quoted a14th-century Byzantine emperor who had made disparaging remarks towards Islam. Later reports indicated that riots and killing actually erupted after only the first word of the Pope’s speech.

“Down with the Pope and down with Michelangelo’s Fresco!” screamed Kali Mohammed Mohammed in front of a Mosque in a small town outside of Islamabad.

“I work at KFC a...
September 16, 2006 by Whacked Man
ISLAMABAD Turkey (WP) – Barely a moment had passed before angry Muslims across the Middle East took to the streets after the Pope quoted a14th-century Byzantine emperor who had made disparaging remarks towards Islam. Later reports indicated that riots and killing actually erupted after only the first word of the Pope’s speech.

“Down with the Pope and down with Michelangelo’s Fresco!” screamed Kali Mohammed Mohammed in front of a Mosque in a small town outside of Islamabad.

“I work at KFC a...